Happy Summer!

I’m not sure why I associate summer with more joy…maybe it is the extra sunlight, or that I get to spend lots of time outdoors. Work tends to slow a bit, and I typically take a beach trip (my parents retired to a fabulous little house right by the Chesapeake Bay, it is a wonderful spot to visit). There seems to be more time to spend with friends, with easy-going meals like burgers on the grill or a simple chicken salad on the menu.

This summer, however, I’ve been running a little grouchy. Despite all of the above lovely options being available, tension has been present. Nothing is really wrong, but there have been lots of stressors to field. You know, life has been life-y.

So, it was really cool last week when I had a moment of pure joy. And I noticed it!

This is the real victory, the noticing.

I was driving on an uncrowded highway, listening to fantastic 80’s music, singing along loudly and badly, heading to a hike with a friend. And I realized I was perfectly content in that moment. I let myself sink into the contentment, enjoy the moment, and let it hang out a while. Tension faded.

We are technically always getting positive, negative and neutral input, but our brains are hardwired to pay the most attention to the negatives. It’s an old evolutionary biology dynamic where surviving is more important than thriving. The problem with this tendency is that we spend more time, energy, attention and brain power on dissecting those negatives. Cue grouchiness.

Shifting attention to the positive inputs, or even just feeling grateful for the neutral days, can help us feel better and builds our skills in noticing, savoring and enjoying those moments. Even us psychologists have to remember to practice this shift from the automatic negative to the deliberate positive.

What have you been noticing lately? I hope it has been something that brings you joy, happiness, contentment or connection.